If you know someone who has recently lost a child, try to avoid telling them these sentences
May-2024
In one of our previous blog posts, we have already talked about some "strange" things you can experience when you become a bereaved parent, but we've also promised to write the part 2 of this topic. Here it is:
1. You'll worry about where your child is and how they feel now. Many bereaved parents, if not all, don't stop caring for their children once they die. You'll catch yourself thinking about where your child is now, can they see you and hear you, and even think about if they are cold or need something. That's completely normal because you are still a parent and worry about your beloved child.
2. You'll ask your child for forgiveness. The next fact can be related to the first one, but also to the guilt. You'll probably, at some point in your grieving process, try to talk to your child and ask for forgiveness. Most often, you weren't able to do things differently, yet you'll still feel guilt because you weren't able to protect and save your child.
3. Becoming delusional. Mental health state can become very rocky and those who had previous episodes of depression, anxiety, or some other mental health issues can go into a delusional state. You'll feel like you're losing your mind like life isn't real, and think about things that aren't even happening. Luckily, a lot of bereaved parents told me that this phase was a short one, but truly intense. You may also feel that no one understands you. Many people tend to "run away" into the imaginary world as well and try to survive these hard times in life.
4. Derealization. Derealization is a product of anxiety and severe stress. You can feel like nothing around you is real. Derealization comes when you expect it the least - for example, while washing the dishes. You touch and see things, but nothing seems real.
5. Old bad patterns. Survival mode will make you do all those things that can instantly make you feel better but definitely aren't useful in the long run. For example, you can start smoking once again, you can cope with your emotional emptiness by binge eating, or you'll sleep through the entire day. In this phase, you're just trying to find literally any pattern that can help you live through the day, and we call that state - a survival mode.
Hope this was helpful - if you have some other suggestions we could write about, just let us know.
